WHOOOAAAAA put on your big doobie wings!

It'll leave skid marks on your soul !

hay guys! what did i miss?!

Oh, hallo, fellow Jerkos!

Just thought I'd pull my head out of my arse long enough to take a whiff of the goings ons over here, and I'm glad to report this blog is as shitty as ever thanks to it's "new" mayor, Sir Prance A Lot. Puts the smell of my own fudge tunnel to shame. SHAME I tells you. What a fine job of shit you've got here, Sir Fuckmyhorn. Welcome to your first day of orifice - WOOPS I meant 'office' hmmh hmmm.

Well, back to jerking off wealthy Americans for me! If any gents are inclined I could have you shown around this fair city by an bevvy of amazonian tour guides who really 'know their way around'. Wink wink and all that, old cocks. Cindy Lauper was right: Money really DOES change everything.

Fuck You Softly,
~ Happy 'Connecticut Kidd' Hans

where is the love?

FUTURE BOX!!!!

JAMMIT JERKS!

Forget hockey and JAMMIT!!!

hockey it up!

thanks to eagle-eyed sorrell booke for bringing this to tSoWR's attention.

sport —boudoir antics excepted— is truly beneath the REAL VICTOR OF RECENT ELECTIONS, but this washington post headline from a recent "match," capitalizes (see what i did there?) on a load of choad.

Wolf T-Shirt

DOUBLE-CLICK THE PICTURE!!!

HOT MOPS!

Take a line drive!!!!!!!

Wha Happened?

SUCK MY DICK, ASSHOLE!

EAT A PILE OF SHIT TODAY!

FUCK YOU!

"he is risen." he is risen, indeed! he is risen like a fucking 3 coil steamer crawling his way back up your rectal cavity, porchy, you FUCK!

the uni-horn blows his corn

i guess it's safe to come back to this shit…



and jerk it



peace out!

a promise

attention, his majesty, king fuck

and his arse-licking agent, PVPedophile

i'm going to spend all future energies ruining this hunk of shit known as jerk city. fuck also blog laver (someone i never actually liked in the first place) and a super fuck you to the fairweather friend drogosaurus — level 10 asshole for ditching my campaign when the going got tough. you're both cold, dry cunts.

BEHOLD THE REVELATION, my true friends: nutsalot & americus.

i take a shit on this blog!

Our saviour returned in the nick of time!!

Thanks to our gracious and forgiving Uni-horned leader, a near blogtastrophe was narrowly averted!!

Behold this aberrant conversation that took place between TSoWR and myself just moments before the Great Rhinocorn's return!!


Whew!!

Beware the golden devil!

Everyone has been wondering where I have been. Well, as you all know, I am Jesus Christ of Jerk City and just like the real JC, I was crucified a few weeks ago. But it's almost Unicorn easter, so I'm back from the dead for the rapture to hide easter eggs straight from my wonderful horn!

If you had read the new jerk testament, you would have seen that It has been foretold in Jerk City revelations that a golden haired dickhead would swoop in and try to become ruler of Jerk City. This dumb dumb would be one that has not been with us from the beginning. A late shithead if you will. THE GOLDEN DEVIL. This is the first sign of the Jerkocalypse.

The second sign is that Americus would no longer be an asian crazed pervert.

There are others, but I forget most of them.

So as ruler, I have come back to Jerk City to bring peace and take with me the worthy Jerks into jerk heaven where we will jerk each other for eternity.

Th election is over. You are all losers.

Blog you very much.

I'm a bit confused....

I'm not sure I quite understand. I understood the election would be over at midnight. Consequently, I took this screencap just to be sure.

Far be it from me to accuse my former opponent of falsifying documents. I'll leave it to the people to decide.

-your mayor

election update

WOO! WOOOOO!!!
all aboard the gravy train, assholes.

tSoWR's commanding lead means all you traitors are licking my caboose.

uhhh, exCUSE *ME,* ASSHOLE!!

polls close at midnight.
please click to enlarge & dig on the date & TIME IN THE UPPER RIGHT HAND. now compare that with the tally, senator asswipe.